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Jesus was a pedophile schizo with a God complex.

By Anonymous | Updated 05/13/26(Wed)03:28:32

Jesus was a pedophile schizo with a God complex.

Jesus was a pedophile schizo with a God complex.
>Every one of Jesus’ apostles besides Peter was underage (neaniskos is the Greek word used)
>When a woman questions why he hangs out with kids he says “don’t scandalize me”
>Tells these boys he will make them “fishers of men”
>Goes into upper rooms and washes their feet while naked
>Tells them to “eat his flesh and drink his haima” (if you think this means “blood” here, see Ezekiel 23:20)
>Is arrested in a public park at 4am with a naked boy (see Mark 14:51-52)
>When the cops show up he says “why do you come for me with swords and clubs like I’m some kind of leistes”
>The word leistes, which gets translated as “thief” is actually “pirate” and was used in contemporary texts (many examples such as Lucian’s Alexander) to refer to sex traffickers
>Sex trafficking was a big problem in the Mediterranean and one of the big things the Romans did was crack down on the pedo pirates. Julius Caesar himself was kidnapped by them as a kid and afterwards had them all crucified
>Jesus Christ was in fact crucified between two other leistes
There's a reason Jesus's "Most Beloved Disciple" is always depicted as a beardless boy whereas the rest of his followers had beards. Dude liked them young

Is that why he's depicted as mohummads friend in the terrorist religion ? >>12948326
based Lord & Savior

Your fortune: Good news will come to you by mail
why do you slander the one true God who is sinless >>12948326
Excuse me, but who are you quoting?

Your fortune: Reply hazy, try again
Abrahamic religions are pedophilic. In other news, the sky is blue. Thanks for the info, Josh.

Your fortune: Bad Luck
Zoomers call everything pedo, to the point that the word is losing all meaning. >>12948326
>man fucks boys in ancient rome
water is wet
i don't know why people are always trying to cancel jesus, Muhammad etc. It has little relevance to the ideological core of the religion who they popped a holy boner over. If you want to criticize abrahamic religion, there a thousands of better arguments to be made than appealing to modern sexual sensibilities. You sound no different than a medieval christian freaking out over stories of witches rimming the devil, it's very civilian.
>>12948326
I mean... Your words kinda make sense... Is there nothing to refute this theory?

>>12948692
This is a mix of a few real textual details, significant linguistic fabrications, and deliberate misreadings. Let me go point by point.

Claims that are outright fabricated or wrong:

"neaniskos means underage" — It doesn't. Neaniskos means "young man" and could refer to anyone from roughly 15 to 35. It is NOT used in the Gospels to describe all apostles except Peter. That framing is invented.

"leistes = sex trafficker" — This is completely made up. Leistes (λῃστής) means bandit, brigand, or robber. It is used in Josephus for Zealot rebels. There is no ancient source using it as a technical term for sex trafficking. The Caesar kidnapping story involves peiratai (pirates), a different word entirely.
"washes feet while naked" — John 13 says Jesus removed his outer garment (himation), which was standard practice to avoid soiling it during a servant's task. Nothing about nudity.

"don't scandalize me" when questioned about children" — This phrasing doesn't exist in the Gospels. Skandalizō appears in "do not hinder the children," a statement about spiritual access, not a defensive response to social suspicion.

Claims with a real basis, badly misread:

Mark 14:51-52 is a real and genuinely odd passage — a young man in a linen cloth flees naked when grabbed. Most scholars think this is Mark inserting himself as an eyewitness cameo. It's set in Gethsemane during the arrest, not a "public park at 4am." The nakedness is him fleeing and leaving the cloth behind, not prior nudity.

>>12948694
The Beloved Disciple depicted as beardless is real in medieval/Renaissance art — it's a convention signaling youth, purity, and intimacy with Christ, inherited from classical Greek depictions of the ideal student-philosopher relationship. It's aesthetic iconography, not a confession.

The Ezekiel 23:20 reference is a very old internet troll move — pointing out that "basar" in Hebrew has flesh/body sexual connotations. The Eucharistic texts are in Greek using "sarx" and "haima" in clearly ritual/theological contexts. The linguistic leap across languages and genres doesn't hold.

The overall structure of the argument:

This is a well-known genre of anti-Christian polemic that works by:
1) Picking real but obscure textual details
2) Inventing or misrepresenting the linguistic meaning of key words
3) Assuming the most scandalous interpretation fills every gap
4) Presenting the chain as if each distortion confirms the next

The Caesar/pirate point is the giveaway — it's true that Caesar was kidnapped by pirates and later had them crucified, but that involved peiratai, not lestai, and the sexual trafficking angle is grafted on with no ancient source support.

Bottom line: The post is creative and knows just enough Greek to sound plausible to someone who doesn't. But the core linguistic claims — especially about leistes — are fabrications, and the readings of real passages require ignoring everything else in the text while projecting a 21st-century framework onto ancient Mediterranean culture.
So is the takeaway from this meant to be that pedophilia is good? >>12948694
>>12948695
Based, thank you Claude AI
you probably believe Michael Jackson was a pedo too >>12948326
wonder why pedos always end up becoming beloved and revered spiritual leaders
>>12948699
Nice dubs. In addition to everything Claude said, I just want to point out that nudity was just a lot more common 2000 years ago. Sewing machines didn't exist, and quality fabric was valuable and expensive. There would be naked bums hanging out in the streets, lower class children would be naked most of the time, and the Greek philosopher Diogenes just hung out naked 24/7 with his dong flapping in the breeze and people just accepted it.
Jesus loves you perverts can't live with themselves unless they imagine the rest of the world must be as perverted as they are >>12948760
that doesnt make sense
half the fun of perversion is revelling in how fucked up you are
gays love to smear upright straights by making them out to be secret grindr sex freaks and I'm not sure how they see it as anything but an admission that their own lifestyle is shameful and disgusting >>12948767
>>12948768
there are two categories of perverts:
those who feel ashamed by their actions and project them onto others to escape the horror at admitting to themselves that they're a pervert, and those who dont care about being shameful or whatever (and so have no need to engage in hypocrisy)
>>12948767
there is very little difference between Christian austerity and being a locked up puppygirl
>>>/pol/
yawn boring
>>12948783
if you call me boring again I'll be forced to post my taint and asshole
>>12948787
Wow lewd! fore
Jesus is Lord >>12948809
>>>/c/>>>/h/>>>/r/>>>/i/>>>/s/>>>/t/>>>/u/>>>/s/
>>>/r/>>>/e/>>>/x/

Your fortune: Reply hazy, try again
>>12948841
christ usrex?
what does that mean?
>>12948851
lel Christus Rex translates to Christ is King

Your fortune: Excellent Luck
>>12948326
>Jesus was
didn't exist.
jewish fairy tale character.
>>12948347
ur mom
>>12948841
Jesus is Lord of little boys and you just proved it by posting him cuddling one right after the pedo pirate pasta
why wouldn't God love little boys? >>12948883
Jesus loves you
>>12948585
human poster realizes le humans are savages
>>12949036
Fact: God loves people who rape little boys and openly offers them forgiveness for raping little boys.
Christianity is Jewish. Jews are pedophiles. Of course Christians are pedophiles too. >>12949051
We know. That's why pedophiles are massively over-represented in Christian communities.
Is that why you're a Christian?
>>12949542
it's actually only been this way since jewish converts started lobbying for it in the 1800's
>>12949581
TIL that Jewish converts in the 1800s were responsible for Christianity being a Jewish religion founded by Jews and based on the Torah.
All of you faggots are so obsessed with jews it’s embarrassing lol >>12949594
Why shouldn't we be interested in jewish people?
>>12949590
gentiles stole monotheism from the israelites like transbians stole anime from real otaku
>>12948993
JESUS CHRIST
LORD OF LITTLE BOYS
5 E V E R

Your fortune: Bad Luck
>>12949703
lole
in the legion of superheroes they had auditions, like cheerleaders and errything
i wish at least to be a substitute
>>12949542
So when will the messiah come?
>>12950219
He won't, because Jewish fairy tales aren't real.

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